Hot sunshine, Blue skies

It feels like a lot has happened since I last updated with a post.

After my trip to Ohio and my bout with strep throat, I eventually made it back to work and got back into the swing of things. But not before some good friends visited and we did some hiking, drove up Pikes Peak (yes, I should have climbed it), and ate a lot of great food!

Work has been keeping be busy...the first couple of weeks back consisted of a lot of office work (felt like they had forgotten to put me on the schedule) but soon enough I was busy out on shift work again. I continue to enjoy the work I do and find it rewarding in so many ways. As my year-term draws to a close, I think about all the wonderful relationships I have formed with the participants and with co-workers. I will deeply miss the work I do and it will leave a hole in my heart for some time.

Just recently one of our participants lost his mother to a heart attack. I was the last instructor to interact with her, as she dropped off her son on Tuesday morning and then passed away that night. After I had heard of her passing, it left me with chills and deep sadness. In our work meeting this month we touched on how to deal with this personally as well as how to treat and respond to this participant. He came to activities this week and seems to be doing well. He has always had a fixation on talking about the same topics and most of the time they are rather morbid. So we were all a little worried about how he would handle this situation. I wonder what the differences are in how people react and handle death and loss? It certainly would be hard to grapple with if you had a developmental disability. --An EMU alumni recently died in a motorcycle accident--and all of these things remind me of the fragility of life and our time here on earth. We are but a moment. I hope to always remain in-tune with my surroundings and never forget the precious people in my life.

A few weeks ago the basement flooded again...not a good time. Handled a lot of the issues on my own since my landlord doesn't care too much. It was a frustrating time and I had to sleep elsewhere for a few nights. It was especially bad this time, as it also flooded the living room in the basement as well as 3/4 of my room. The smell was pretty unbearable. Fans dried it out eventually and Asher and I also rented a carpet cleaner, sucking up a lot of water. Things are back to normal and put in place for the most part. I am ready to move out and crossing my fingers that it doesn't happen again. Thanks to all who thought and prayed for me during that time. I couldn't have made it through without support and prayers.

I had a wonderful birthday weekend and day....last Saturday shared a birthday BBQ with a friend who shares the same birthday. It was hot day, but a fun- filled time with good food, laughter, sunshine, and good company. On Wednesday, I didn't have to work (miraculously)- so me and some friends went tubing on Boulder creek (pretty wild) and then went out for lunch. Then I went out to eat with Asher to BeniHana...and it was delicious! Also received a spectacular package from my parents, filled with all sorts of goodies! So it was a great day and I felt a lot of love! Thanks for all the well-wishes!!

My time is nearing with about one month left of work. I have mixed emotions and will deeply miss parts of my life here, but yet also look on Harrisonburg and all the warmth and support there. I know my transition back will be rocky. I have an apartment and am excited to be living alone for once in my life. I am know applying for job positions and am praying that something lines up.

Blessings to all,

Lindsey

My trip to Ohio was met with busyness, wedding happiness, family togetherness, and a whirlwind of activity. Flying in I saw: lush green terrain, rolling hills, farms with silos. I breathed a sigh of relief as we landed and felt right at home in the arms of my mother and father.

But the whole time I was in Ohio..I kept thinking how I didn't really feel anything for the place. And then I got to thinking about my friends who were staying around the area or living somewhere in Ohio (...and not that I feel like I need a big adventure in my life; or that Ohio isn't good enough) and it's just not where I want to be living.

The trip wasn't exactly restful and not the typical visit home, as there were tons of people around and things to be done. But it was nice to see friends at the wedding that I hadn't seen for awhile, as well as family. I hope to never take relationships for granted whether they are coming or going.

I arrived back in the great state of Colorado...only to get utterly sick. Sunday and Monday it felt like death was knocking (not literally but with the fatigue, weakness, and loneliness- sorta). Thought I had the flu or something...finally went to the doctor on Wednesday and she thought it was strep throat so now I'm on antibiotics. This is the 3rd time this year (2010) that I've been on antibiotics!! I've never been so sick in all my life! Prayers for continued healing and good health would be appreciated. I have a lot more energy and looking forward to having a normal routine again soon...

That said...the time is dwindling down. (That is strange to write). I have mixed emotions...bittersweet, like the end of college was for me as well. Being alone and sick this week though, I discovered that I have in fact made a good decision in moving back east. There aren't good friends for me here and nothing meaningful to keep me around. I know things will be different when I move back, but I welcome having some family and good friends around. At the same time, I have developed good relationships with people/families at church that I will truly miss. As well as just liking the idea of being in place where I can be whoever I want and starting something for myself.

The garden grows!!! I was so excited to come home and find that my plants had doubled in size and seem to be doing fairly well. Hopefully there is produce before I leave!!

Well that is all for now...hope that all are doing well.

Prayer for Guidance (Rev. Julie Mustonen)

Oh God of Light and Love

the journey begins with a few small steps.

May your spirit light my path

and open my heart

as I seek to follow you.

May I come to a fuller knowledge

of who I am as your child.

so that I may serve you in the best way.

May you help me move ahead

with courage and joy,

savoring the stages as I pass through them,

looking for signs of your presence and guidance.

Throughout this journey into faithfulness,

may I be ever mindful and encouraged by

the life and work of Jesus Christ,

who walks beside me, friend and redeemer. Amen.

Hands in the dirt

Dirty hands. Cool soil. Moist plants. Fresh earth.

Time-- invested. Hope--it'll grow. Love--planted.

I put in a little garden tonight in our "backyard". It felt so good to get my hands in the earth again...kinda made me miss my summer job at OARDC. There is something therapeutic about digging holes, feeling the dirt under your fingernails, and knowing that you're starting a plant's life. This is my first attempt at growing something solely on my own...and I really hope that life springs forth.

I think I needed that plant therapy after my week. It's not that I had a bad week or even too crazy...I just came into the week not feeling rested from the previous weekend and a little unprepared. So am really looking forward to having a few days off!

I should tell you about last weekend. It was...epic. And not in a good way. I worked Thursday and Friday nights. Friday night was my first time experiencing that shift and it was crazy! (which I hear, it was an unusual night) We ate out and the restaurant took forever with our 30+ bills and I was still in the office at 1:00am. Then I had to turn around and go back to work Saturday morning! So I finally get home Saturday afternoon and am looking forward to relaxing and the weekend! My one housemate and his family and friends were staying at our house because it was Sam's birthday last Friday. They decided to go to a Rockies game and that left me with the house to myself ...I was happy :) So I decided to take a shower before getting some supper. (Keep in my mind, I have a basement room and bathroom in the house...and people rarely come down there. RARELY.) I lock the bathroom door since I'm home alone and the doors are open upstairs. After my shower, I realize that the lock on the door is spinning around and around and has somehow unlatched from the doorknob. Leaving me...yes...that's right....locked in. I try EVERYTHING....I try slamming the door. Yanking on it from left to right. Up to down. I try taking off the hinges- but I don't have any tools so no luck there. I tried for a good 30-45 mins and then decided that I wasn't going anywhere. And surprisingly I didn't freak out too badly. Luckily, Sam's brother and sister-in-law were sleeping in the basement so I knew that whenever they got back, I would be saved. In the meantime, I cleaned the toilet really well(!), gave myself a manicure/pedicure, listened to the radio, straightened my hair, did my make-up, and eventually slept (yes, on the bathroom floor with sheets from the closet). They finally came home close to 3 a.m. and Sam's sister-in-law undid the screws on the outside and saved me! That was the longest 8 hours of my life (honestly)...at some points I just sat there, bored out of my mind.

That situation really made me re-think living alone or being alone in a house. Especially having the basement room and the fact that our house isn't very community-oriented....all make living downstairs a little scary. In that 8 hours I ran through all the worst case scenarios I could think of...including the fact that if people had not been sleeping down in the basement, I could have potentially been in there for a few days. No lie. Our house does not keep close tabs on each other and the guys only come downstairs to do laundry or grab the debit card.

But needless to say...I was somehow oddly blessed through that and made it out in one piece! That's not to say that I have a little phobia of that bathroom now and like to take my phone in there with me during shower time. The rest of my weekend was busy, but good. Went to a Rockies game on Sunday afternoon and baked in the sun for a few hours. And Monday I went to the Boulder Creek Festival downtown and had some fun there and then went to a BBQ at some church people's place.

This week we geared up for Summer camp at work...it begins this coming up Monday and should be crazy! They've hired 25 additional staff and are still hiring. It will be interesting working with new staff who don't know what they're doing, as well as meeting new kids. I think it will be fun and I'm mostly looking forward to it. Except for the long day part....should be tiring! I'm carpooling on Monday and picking up the first guy at 6:45 am. Boo.

I am looking forward to flying home Wednesday!! I am in my friend's wedding on the 12th and then my mom's family is getting together the following week. Should be nice to see some family I haven't seen in quite some time.

I am feeling...happy right now and look forward to the progress my plants will make.

Here's to hoping,

Lindsey

Tonight I come home from work with a full heart and a feeling of being content. Something about my evening shift filled a space within me.

The shift is called "Giddy Up" and it involves participants interacting with horses at a therapeutic horse program. We've been attending for the spring season and tonight was our last night. It was a night of celebration as we made treats for the horses and the participants were finally able to RIDE a horse. Afterwards we had a time of sharing and went around the circle and said things that we appreciated about each participant that attends. And for some reason, this meant so much to me. I wish I could do this with all of my participants and let them know what they mean to me and how special they are. But the best part was hearing what participants had to say about each other. One guy explained his connections with the horses and how meaningful that has been for him. The horse's power and presence. Their gentleness and kindness. And how he sees another participant's love for one particular horse.

Another participant said good-bye to a horse she had deeply fallen in love with and has joked of taking home with her. She turned to me, eyes filled with tears...and I saw the love and sadness as I explained that it was okay to cry and she had had a wonderful time playing and getting to know Starlight.

I work with such beautiful people. They are filled with joy, love, and life. They interact with open arms. They laugh, play, and cry. And most of all they have blessed my life beyond words. I am brought to tears thinking about their gentle spirits and how despite supposed "challenges" in their lives, they are caring and giving.

May God grant us all the nature of humility and love.

Blessings,

Lindsey

It's been a while since I've posted an update.

In the past month....

~ my family visited for an extended weekend. It was a wonderful time together...and they spoiled me. We explored downtown, ate out, shopped, etc...but the best part was sharing laughter together. I felt rejuvenated after their visit and am so blessed to have such a wonderful, loving, and supportive family. Oh and my father (bless his heart) drove my car out, all the way from Ohio. He tried selling it in the fall, but to no avail. Somehow things aligned and now I have wheels. It's a strange feeling. After 6-7 months of using public transportation and walking, I sometimes feel guilty just hopping in my car. It is a blessing though after a 10-11 hour day to just get in my car and be home within 15 minutes. I definitely won't take having a vehicle for granted, that's for sure. I feel like I have some of my freedom and independence back.

~ work has been busy. More instructors have been hired, but I think we are still understaffed. There is one shift that always ends in frustration and it mostly has to do with staffing needs and scheduling. The Tuesday swimming shift with the adults is a pain. We are short male staff on those afternoons and there are quite a few male participants who require assistance with changes. A few weeks ago, it was really bad and one of our male staff (who is fairly new) was not helping people as needed. I eneded up being a half hour late for my drop-offs. It's interesting to see how a system works when everyone is team-oriented and self-less. And then one person puts a small glitch in that system- it doesn't just affect that one person, it affects everyone because we are connected to each other. The same might be said for my housing situation. Granted we aren't as interconnected as say my work environment. But when you have a small unit arrangement- one person out of three makes for a large percentage of the vibe. I still struggle with my one housemate's personality and social awareness. It's an ongoing battle and I continually need reminders from God about patience and respect.

~ I've been hanging out with two guys from church a lot more. Which has been fun, but also makes me feel another hole in my life for girlfriends. I really appreciate these guys and they are good friends, whom I feel I can share my experience with and other joys and trials of life. I feel blessed to have their friendships and sometimes think, if I didn't have them- who would I hang out with? Good question... but I am looking forward to some fun times this summer.

We are getting closer to summer camp at work...this makes me excited and a little nervous. It means tripling our kids and hiring 40 some additional staff. I've heard mixed reviews, like either you love it or hate it. And the days are long and tiring. My term ends at the end of August...and it feels more real when people talk to me about my future plans or me leaving. I think I have mixed feelings somewhat. Especially since there are so many great people in the congregation and I am enjoying Denver and Boulder's options for entertainment and fun. But somehow that isn't enough and still leaves me feeling mediocre.

I feel like some of my experience can be attributed to this being my first year out of college. The last four years of my life were filled with quality social interaction, friends right and left, a nurturing Christian environment, etc. Plus college is a sub-reality and basically just fun mixed in with learning. So of course that has been adjustment to this year. To put myself into a place where I didn't know a soul, let alone had never visited...that's a huge step. And I chose Boulder...even though I knew it was small unit. That was a gamble. Put I still played it. So I don't know what I'm saying...I suppose...that I made decisions and was brought to this place. I don't regret it by any means...if anything this year has taught me patience and servanthood. Challenges are a part of the journey and they have developed my character and changed me.

God continues to be faithful and provides. I really shouldn't complain, considering the huge blessings I have in my life and the love and support that I receive.

Our choices do reflect on God's reputation, our witness in the world, and our fellowship with Him. But God will never reject His people, those who are truly His. The Lord cannot and will not forsake His own. (Heb 13:5)- From Our Daily Bread-

Palm Sunday

Palm Sunday. What does it mean?

Two years ago I had the privilege of being in the old city of Jerusalem for this Sunday. Hundreds of Christians from all over the world gathered to walk down the Mt. of Olives, waving palm branches- many singing, strumming guitar, banging drums.

I led the children's story this morning and did some research on Palm Sunday that I found interesting and wanted to share with you.

The palm branch was a symbol of triumph and victory in pre-Christian times. The Romans rewarded champions of the games and celebrated military successes with palm branches. Jews followed a similar tradition of carrying palm branches during festive times.

In Biblical times, the regional custom called for kings and nobles arriving in procession to ride on the back of a donkey. The donkey was a symbol of peace and those who rode upon them proclaimed peaceful intentions. The laying of palm branches indicated that the king or dignitary was arriving in victory or triumph. However in later times, when aristocracy used horses, depicting the Messiah as riding a donkey came to have an opposite connotation- as indicating a simple, sober way of life and avoiding luxury.

Donkeys:

-can carry 20-30% of their own weight

-known for their loud vocalizations

-used as farming/dairy animals

-stubborn

-appear to be quite intelligent, cautious, friendly, playful, eager to learn

I think that we are sometimes like donkeys. We are stubborn at times- don't want to budge when it comes to certain situations or interactions with people. But we are friendly, intelligent people- yet sometimes we feel small and insignificant in the grand scheme of things. But just as Jesus chose to ride in on a donkey...so God has chosen us to be ambassadors and has plans for us. In "Our Daily Bread" it says: Think of it! The Creator of the universe needs us and desires to fit us into His eternal design! Though all-powerful and not dependent on any creature, He has chosen to carry out His plans through lowly human instruments. If this were not so, He would have taken us to heaven as soon as He saved us by His grace.

Something to ponder as we enter into Holy Week and prepare for Jesus' arrest and crucifixion.

Pictures

View from Rocky Mountain National Park
Mary, myself, and Jenna
God's majesty
How can you not see God's face in nature?